Here are over 40 funny jokes at VP Joe Biden's expense.
Biden has shown time and time again that he is a comedians dream. He makes their job a lot easier!

1. "There are reports that if Joe Biden runs for president, he would promise to serve for only one term – because nothing says confidence like promising your presidency would be over quickly." –Jimmy Fallon

2. "A spokesman for the White House yesterday said Vice President Joe Biden has received president Obama's blessing to run for president.

3. "Vice President Joe Biden will travel to Iowa this week, three days after Hillary Clinton's high-profile return to the state. He'll spend two days there – one campaigning and another stuck in a corn maze." –Jimmy Fallon

4. "President Obama was giving an interview recently, and get this, he said he thought that Joe Biden would be a good president. When asked why, he was like, 'Because he'd make me look AMAZING.'" –Jimmy Fallon

5. "Speaking of Obama, yesterday Congressman Raul Labrador said that impeaching President Obama isn't a good idea, because, quote, 'no one wants President Joe Biden.' And that's when Biden realized why Obama picked him as a running mate." –Jimmy Fallon

6. "A high school girl has invited Joe Biden to be her prom date.
Isn't that nice? However, her father is refusing to let her go with a guy who can't really describe what he does for a living." –Conan O'Brien

7. "The United States has traded an American POW for five Taliban prisoners. Originally, the deal included Joe Biden, but the Taliban said no." –David Letterman

8. "After discovering a new dwarf planet orbiting the sun beyond Pluto, scientists have named it '2012 VP113' or 'Biden' for short. Scientists say they chose the name because the planet, like Biden, is pretty far out there." –Seth Meyers

9. "President Obama said that his strategy for foreign policy is to be patient and determined. Which is also his strategy when it comes to Biden's bedtime." –Jimmy Fallon

10. "On Saturday President Obama and Joe Biden spent more than four hours playing golf together. Joe Biden’s handicap is 20, while Obama’s handicap . . . is Joe Biden." –Jimmy Fallon

11. "Vice President Joe Biden said today that he had to ask his wife Jill to marry him five times before she said yes. Five times! Joe, that's not a proposal, that's harassment." –Jay Leno

12. "This week Vice President Joe Biden spoke at a senior center in Iowa. Which explains why the seniors were like, 'Is this Hell?'" –Jimmy Fallon

13. "It's a great day for President Obama. His healthcare law was upheld by the Supreme Court. The president apparently had three speeches ready to go this morning. One if the law was overturned, one if the law was upheld, and one if Joe Biden chewed up the other two." –Craig Ferguson

14. "A Republican official says that Mitt Romney should pick 'an incredibly boring white guy as running mate.' When he heard that, Joe Biden said, 'Thanks, I've already got a gig.'" –Conan O'Brien

15. "A reporter in Florida was forced into a closet by Joe Biden's staff to keep him from talking to guests at a fund-raiser. The guy said it wouldn't have been so bad if Biden wasn't already in there for the same reason." —Jimmy Fallon

16. "The White House may have to lay off all nonessential workers if the government shuts down. You know: interns, pages, Biden..." —Jimmy Fallon

17. "Sarah Palin has managed to use her failed vice presidential run to put herself in a position of power and influence. Joe Biden won the race and he hasn't been able to put himself in a position of power and influence." –Craig Ferguson

18. "Vice President Joe Biden has suggested to people out of work to just 'hang in there.' What a difference two years makes: Remember 'hope and change'? Now it's 'hang in there.'" —Jay Leno

19. "Vice President Joe Biden said there has been no 'substantive damage' to the United States by Julian Assange in the whole WikiLeaks scandal. He says it has been embarrassing, but you can't prosecute people for embarrassing the United States. If that were true, Joe Biden would be serving life in prison." –Jay Leno

20. "Sir Paul McCartney played at the White House last night. He dedicated the Beatles song 'Michelle' to the First Lady. Isn't that lovely? And then for Joe Biden, he played 'Fool on the Hill.'" --Craig Ferguson

21. "Joe Biden accidentally revealed the location of the Vice President's top secret bunker. The guy can't help it. But he did apologize. He said, 'I am so sorry for the mistake. The launch code is 85334. It will never happen again. It will never happen again. My Gmail password is robot23. What am I doing? The house key is under the plant near the doorstep.'" --Jimmy Fallon

22. "Vice President Joe Biden is on a trip to Bosnia, Serbia, and Kosovo. The White House is calling it 'Operation Keep Biden Away From the Microphones.'" --Jay Leno

23. "Here's something that I am very excited about. Joe Biden, the current vice president, was yakking away over the weekend. And he -- remember when Dick Cheney was in an undisclosed location and everybody thought: Where? So supposedly top secret information, classified information. And Joe Biden just says, 'No, I know where he was. He was hiding under his house. Joe Biden is living proof that people can give up sensitive information without being tortured.'" --David Letterman

24. "At the Gridiron Dinner, Joe Biden started talking and accidentally revealed Dick Cheney's secret hiding place. See, there's more proof you don't need waterboarding to get secret information. Just give Joe Biden a couple of drinks....This is part of our new plan. It's called 'Don't Ask, We'll Tell.'" --Jay Leno

25. "There was a private screening of 'Star Trek' at the White House over the weekend. And President Obama said he really liked the film. The best thing about private screenings, because we get to do them – it's not like seeing it with the public, you know, where there might be some moron talking through the whole movie. In fact, that's why they didn't tell Joe Biden." --Jay Leno

26."Oh, man, Biden did it again. God may have taken away Bush, but by golly, he gave us Joe Biden. You see this today? Joe Biden was on the 'Today' show, and he said he would tell his family members not to take any commercial flights and don't ride in any subway cars because of this swine flu. You know, I don't think Joe Biden’s going to catch swine flu, but it’s pretty obvious he has a case of foot-in-mouth disease.” –Jay Leno

27. "Vice President Joe Biden said on the 'Today' show that the subways in New York City are not safe because of swine flu. Hey Joe, listen to this - the subways weren’t safe before swine flu." –David Letterman

28. "Oh, on Friday, President Obama was taken to a secure location in the White House after a single engine plane strayed over White House air space. As a precaution, they took the President to a place in the White House nobody even knew existed -- Joe Biden's office." --Jay Leno

29. "Hey, I thought this was nice. To celebrate Earth Day, a group of schoolchildren in Washington each planted a hair plug in Joe Biden's head." --Jay Leno

30. "President Obama says his daughters will take care of the dog, but who picks up the dog's poop after the kids go to sleep? Well, that duty will fall on a low-level employee with nothing else to do. Joe Biden's going to be cleaning up." --Craig Ferguson

31. The Obamas have chosen a new White House dog. It is a Portuguese water dog named Bo. Very cute dog. Their first choice was a wheaten terrier, but it was arrested for tax evasion. Bo arrived just in time, because Sasha and Malia were getting tired of throwing Frisbees at Joe Biden." --Jimmy Fallon

32. "Today was Joe Biden's first full day as vice president. Yeah, advisors say Biden spent most of the day watering his hair." --Conan O'Brien

33. "It's Vice President-elect Joe Biden's birthday today. And Barack Obama bought him 12 cupcakes for his birthday, which is a smart gift to give Biden because when his mouth is full of cupcakes he can't say anything stupid." --Craig Ferguson

34. "Late last night, Sen. Barack Obama was elected the 44th president of these United States. And even if you are a Republican or a member of one of the small crazy people parties, you could find something to be happy about, whether it's that we have our first-ever African-American president or even that we have our first vice president with hair plugs." --Jimmy Kimmel

35. "See, I got to admit, as a comedian, I'm gonna miss President Bush. Because Barack Obama is not easy to do jokes about. He doesn't give you a lot to go on. See, this is why God gave us Joe Biden." --Jay Leno

36. "I guess there seems to be some trouble brewing between Sarah Palin and John McCain. McCain aides say that Sarah Palin is 'going rogue' and not taking advice or notes from the McCain campaign. They say it is hard to keep her from going off script and making statements that hurt the campaign. It's gotten so bad, her Secret Service codename is now 'Joe Biden.'" --Jay Leno

37. "After his big speech in North Carolina today, Senator Joe Biden said he was experiencing a sore throat and lost his voice. Boy, the good news doesn't stop for Barack Obama. Just one lucky break after another." --Jay Leno

38. "They began filming a porno movie this week called 'Nailin' Palin.' They've hired a woman who looks like Governor Palin to star in this porn movie. It's called 'Nailin Palin,' and they expect a lot of guys to go see it. The porn movie nobody wants to see? 'Ridin' Biden.'" --Jay Leno

39. "You know, an article in the Washington Post today said that some medical experts believe Joe Biden may have had Botox. In fact, you know how they could tell? His expression didn't change when they asked him about his hair plugs." --Jay Leno

40. "And as you know, they've already come out with a Sarah Palin action figure. And today, the Democrats released a Joe Biden action figure. It talks and talks and talks. You just can't get the thing to shut up." --Jay Leno




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